A group of poems/letters

This is a group of poems/letters which I’ve written over the past months.

A lucid dream

(I started writing this one on 03-07-2017 and finished it on 10-07-2017. I remember writing it as a letter to my love some time during the same month.)

You know how, when in a lucid dream,
the boundaries of reality become so fragile
I wanna take you out of this world
Away from all of its demons and all of its gods

Continue reading

Advertisements

My first letter to a friend

(I wrote this letter over the course of a few days to my friend whom I’ll refer to as S. -for privacy reasons- and delivered it to her on Wed, the 16th of March 2017)

Dear Beloved S.,

I’m writing this to you after almost 2 days of trying to respect your desire for me to leave you alone as much as possible. It has been very difficult for me, but if you are really happy, I’ll use all my power to bare the loneliness and the pain of being away from you when I want to be close, just for your sake and your happiness.

They say Einstein once said: “We can’t solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we faced them.” I think there is a recurring problem in our friendship and I’m writing this to try and explain, in some detail, why I think there are better ways of dealing with bad times other than the way we’re currently choosing. I hope you read this carefully, put yourself in my place, and, at least, reconsider, for my sake, please.

Continue reading

My cold and dark universe (Part 4: More on cold loneliness)

I wanted everything I never had
Like the love that comes with light
I wore envy and I hated that
But I survived

I had a one-way ticket to a place where all the demons go
Where the wind don’t change
And nothing in the ground can ever grow
No hope, just lies
And you’re taught to cry into your pillow

~ Alive, Sia

 

A weird kind of loneliness:

For years I had no good ways of expressing my agony. I wasn’t even allowed to cry in my bedroom when I needed to. I didn’t even have a bedroom of my own, as I shared one with my younger brother. The number of nights in which I wanted to sob or scream but suppressed my voice as not to be heard are just countless. That was regarding the space I had in my home, or rather lacked.

Continue reading

Insodus: Returning back to the jungle (nightmares)

Insodus is a word I made up as an antonym of Exodus.

Next week this time I’ll be back in the country that hurt me so much that the mere thought of returning to it hurts. My land of slavery and bondage. Continue reading

The Exodus (phase 1): The beautiful smell of liberty =)

20151020_130115 - Copy

“Congratulations! You’re now a Permanent Resident of Canada!”
~ Immigration officer at the Montreal international airport, 18th of Oct 2015, around 4:30 pm EST

I’ll never forget these words for what they meant to me. However, several months ago I imagined I would be ten times more excited about hearing them, but my excitement was temporarily limited for other reasons … Continue reading