I tried to wash away the tears,
But the water from my eyes was more than that in my hands.
The bitterness of my tears overtook the neutrality of the river.
What is it about my tears that incite anger rather than compassion?!
People’s faces in public transport in the morning, that are so neutral and cold.
No one knows how different they were last night.
A warm smile on a warmer shoulder, laughs of joy and excitement,
Or wails and screams begging a loved one not to leave.
I can’t seem to smile at children again.
That disgusting envy!
Why couldn’t I have the same love and happiness they have?
Why couldn’t I have the warmth that all creatures need?
When Oppenheimer witnessed an experimental atomic explosion, he reportedly remembered the line from the Hindu scripture, the Bhagavad-Gita, “Now I [have] become Death, the destroyer of worlds.”
This, to me, is a very strong line. It often makes me think about how it didn’t say “I bring death” or “I have become the source of death”, and instead describes a state of “becoming death” itself. It’s so much power that it’s not only a “destroyer of lives”, rather a destroyer of entire worlds. Continue reading →
(I wrote this about my friend SR, and have been struggling for a while to complete it. I guess that means it is complete, so I decided it to post it as is.)
When you step out of a warm shower on a cold night, the world seems colder.
But it’s somehow warmer, when you step out of a warm hug that you’ve awaited forever.
“But forever could just be around the corner”, she said without a second thought.
A thought that lingered in my mind. Continue reading →
(I wrote this on the 28th of Jan 2017 as an attempt to describe my state of mind around the end of a phase of depression, where the dark thoughts are still felt, but not as effective.)
Warning: objects in mirror are closer than they appear.
Bad memories appear closer than they really are, good times seem rarer. True friends seem fewer, haters multiplied. Darkness seems endless, light like a split second. Pain feels stronger, happiness abstract. Hurtful voices sound louder, praise and support insincere. Misery abundantly immanent, laughs lost in oblivion. Everyone disappoints, kindness is invisible. Nights are colder, our hearts made of stone.